How changing your story can change your life | Lori Gottlieb

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How changing your story can change your life | Lori Gottlieb 5

Stories help you make sense of your life -- but when these narratives are incomplete or misleading, they can keep you stuck instead of providing clarity. In an actionable talk, psychotherapist and advice columnist Lori Gottlieb shows how to break free from the stories you've been telling yourself by becoming your own editor and rewriting your narrative from a different point of view.

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Such a quotable talk!
- We are all unreliable narrators of our own lives.
- To tell a story is inescapably to take a moral stance.
- Stories are the way we make sense of our lives.
- The way we narrate our lives shapes what they become.
- Change, even really positive change, involves a surprising amount of loss.
- What would happen if you looked at your story and wrote it from another person’s point of view?
- Life is about choosing which stories to listen to, and which ones need an edit.
- There’s nothing more important to the quality of our lives than the stories we tell ourselves about them.

What do you want your story to be? Go write your masterpiece!

Author — Happy Naturalist


"if you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging."

Author — emma thérèse


This is very powerful. Editing how you perceive the world and reshaping your responses can lead to deep and powerful changes. I’ve seen it. I’ve experienced it. An excellent TED talk!

Author — J H


Damn. She’s just gave me a therapy session!

Author — Charles Alvin


This is a masterpiece of a Ted Talk. Easy to understand, short, concise and the prison bar analogy, perfect.

Author — John Smith


The biggest jail is one's mind. Being rigid and having wrong patterns is what prevents one to be free

Author — alEx S


This is a rare gem after a long series naff TED talks.

Author — Truthful Chap


I wish she would have given examples of what a changed story should sound like. Like in that woman’s case. She needs an edit I know but i wish she gave examples of exactly what good edits would sound like in her circumstance or in any other circumstance. I don’t have much of an imagination.

Author — Katie Kat


I always get inspired by Ted talks for complete 1 day but on the next day I get distracted 😂😂

Author — Gargi Gole


ok she's convinced me to see a therapist now

Author — potato lala


My parents got divorced when I was in my middle school. The letters in the talk sound so familiar that when I was little, my dad and mom would tell me totally different versions of the same story, and their words confused me for many years. When I grow up, I realized that it's not about right or wrong. It's just people can only understand the world from their own perspectives, which are usually narrow. And my solution is to honestly express yourself to others, exchange your feelings, your views, or your emotions with your partner, so you can understand each other better. It is so important and useful. Hope everyone can live a happy life instead of being trapped like my parents many years ago

Author — Danmeng ma


The key is being truthful and honest about oneself.

Author — Saved By Grace


New words: devastated, misleading, clarity

Author — Uyen Nguyen


So true and what she said was in my heart

Author — Rohit AryaL


One of the most useful stories I've ever listened to in Ted Talk, it helps me deal with myself.

Author — Tuan Ngoc


May I ask, to those who know: is this what is meant by narrative counseling?

Author — hopscotch30


She sounds very Kellian.

This, if true, would be a good thing.

Author — David Andrews


One of my favourite TED talks up to date. It made me think about some behavioural patterns of people around me and of myself in a new way. I hope it will help me understand some stuff better in the future. Thank you for that! Definetely gonna share this.

Author — Jonas Bux


FYI when someone's depressed they are acutely aware of their mortality; they either feel dead already, want to kill themselves, or just do not care to be here, because nothing has any meaning, nothing matters, and there is no purpose for anything, including perspectives on one's own life. So the idea of rewriting their own story also has no purpose. Their obit makes no difference to the world because whether people think you were utterly pathetic or the strongest, most resilient person to walk the face of earth is of absolutely no consequence.

Author — dwyerb


" what I told you was true, from a certain point of view "
Ben Kenobi

Author — Sharp Design