Want to Be Happy? Give Up on Happiness! - Teal Swan

  • 🎬 Video
  • ℹ️ Published 8 years ago

This video is designed for people who feel powerlessness about happiness. People, who feel like happiness is beyond their reach.

Happiness has become the new enlightenment. It has become the new heaven. An unattainable goal, a finish line that we keep chasing. There is a kind of shame that arises within us when we are unhappy. This is especially painful when we identify with being unhappy. Some of us don't have any idea what happiness really is, because we have never felt it. We feel like we "should be happy" even when we aren't. We feel the very worst about ourselves because we can't seem to "get life right and be happy like other people can". We begin to feel like we are karmically destined to suffer. This issue of attaching to happiness is just another branch off of the tree I like to call "trying to get life right". We believe that if we are happy, we are getting our life right and if we are unhappy, we are getting our life wrong. We are holding onto the painful thought that we should be happy, even when we are not. This reaction to being unhappy only makes us unhappier. So what do we do about it?

Teal explains that the best thing we can do is to Give up on happiness. The idea of giving up on happiness may sound very odd coming from a spiritual leader because it is the job of a spiritual teacher to teach people how to find happiness. But Teal asserts that many contradictory teachings are in fact quite complimentary; and that this is one of them. Teal explains that if you give up on happiness, you are releasing resistance to suffering and/or unhappiness. And thus, you are allowing yourself to flow in the direction of happiness.



Teal Swan is a revolutionary for personal transformation and is one of The Most Spiritually Influential Living People in the world. As a renowned author, speaker and social media star, she travels the world teaching self-development and teaching people how to transform their emotional, mental, physical and spiritual pain.


Meditations, Books, Merchandise & Frequency Paintings:


Beginning Song:
Kuan Yin's Mantra (c) 2002 Lisa Thiel

Please note that I do not respond to posts from this site. Please promptly reach out to a mental health practitioner near you discuss treatment options. My teachings on the subject of suicide are meant to supplement your treatment with a mental health practitioner and should not be in lieu of such treatment. The information contained on this site is not intended or implied to be a substitute for such professional medical or mental health advice. Always seek the advice of your own licensed and qualified medical and mental health professionals. The information provided in this site and in my videos should not be used for the diagnosis or treatment of any mental health condition. A licensed physician, psychologist, and/or mental health provider should be consulted for a diagnosis and treatment of any and all medical and mental health conditions. Please immediately call your physician, mental health professional or 911 for all emergencies.

💬 Comments

I watch this video once a week. I love the fact that I can just go to your uploads and watch whatever it is that I need to remind myself that day.  You've been a blessing in my life and you are on my list of "positive aspects of my situation. " Sending love your way, Teal.

Author — Muge Jones


How is it possible I haven't heard about Teal Swan before. She is amazing. Eye opening and accurate.



What I actually did a week ago: I have a "vision board" on my wall. For weeks I felt so pressured looking at the pictures of what I want to have that I finally decided to take down all pictures. Now, there is an empty board on my wall (with some necklaces) and I feel a lot better now looking at it. I let go of all my dreams and I don't want my happiness to depend on whether I reach these things or not.

Author — Miyankochan


This is amazing. I actually feel better after watching this.

Author — Purple Lily


Be happy for no reason, like a child. If your happy for a specific reason, you're in trouble, because that reason can easily be taken away from you!

Author — Bruce Keen


This woman is a genius!! :) I've been really unhappy for not being able to be happy.. thank You Teal! So much!!

Author — Luca Zsófia Orosz


I am 59 years old and I have been on a journey of self discovery for over 30 years and your wisdom is so great for someone as so much younger, though women are much more intuitive than men. You are the real deal and I have benefited by your sharing. Thank you so much. Much love.

Author — Philip Bonanno


This is some of the most beautifully enlightening information I've ever heard in my entire life. Thank you so much for this message.

Author — Aaron Israel


I LOVE you Teal <3 I always listen to you and your videos in times of imbalance and mental chaos...and you always inspire me to grow and become a better human being and find my peace. Thank you for inspiring and guiding so many of us!

Author — SoSquishyy


Listening to you has become part of my daily ritual.. sending love 🌹

Author — charu sharma


I absolutely 100% agree with this and I know intellectually and experientially that what she is saying is true. As soon as you let go of something you really want it shows up almost instantaneously and its remarkable how often I come across scenarios like that happening in my own life. Time and again your videos and that of other spiritual teachers have had that excellent timing and resonance with exactly what I have been going through and thinking at those times and for that I am deeply grateful towards you and the universe. May your life be filled with an abundance of joy and fullfillment in the most harmonious and extraordinary ways. Thank you.

Author — Vigo


The other day I saw a video of a handicaped young girl. It just blew my mind. It touched me so deeply how joyful she was. It made me question my own notion of happines so deeply I couldn't stop crying. I think for the first time in my life I TRULY realised how I neglected myself. And I was the one who felt handicaped in that moment.

Author — dud


"Should" is one word we should eradicate from our repertoire, especially during self-dialogue. What we "should" do is become open to continual learning, so that there are no mistakes, only lessons. The learning itself is often a source of happiness. Thank you for this video!

Author — K Moore1


You know, this is actually a VERY effective method of getting rid of depression, I believe. It reminds me of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, a form of thought-control that psycholigists/therapists use for drug-free healing of depredsive disorders. Wonderful job, Teal!

Author — Abigail Nileen


You are so smart Teal - watching this video has ironically made me feel happier than ever!!  Keep up the great work - we need you! :-D

Author — Michele Mussatto Videography


SUMMARY - Want to Be Happy? Give Up on Happiness! - Teal Swan

Emphasizing the importance of happiness adds unhappiness/resistance to unhappiness

You feel shame, destined to suffer, inferior if you cant manage to be happy

You hold the belief that you should be happy seeing happy as right and unhappy as wrong, which perpetuates unhappiness

Thinking you should be happy makes you resist negative emotions, which make them persist
Resisting unhappiness makes you desperately desire for happiness which you think you can not have
because you focus on on unhappiness

The solution is to give up on happiness
Giving up on happiness makes you release resistance to suffering and or happiness
Realeasing resistance to what you dont want allows you to flow in the direction of what you do want

The universe knows that you want to be happy
Everything you want is because is you want to be happy.

The universe pushes you towards happiness arranging all necessary conditions for
your happiness

Expansion is achieved through your perspective and if you align with and experience your own desires
Thats why the universe helps you to be happy always

All of the various beliefs that perpetuate unhappiness
like they were karmically destined to suffer -
they turn us against that gale-force wind that is the Universe.
They make it so that we are in a state of resistance.

Tha accute absence of something makes you desperate need opposite
you cant get what you want if you desire on the lack of it.

if your desire for happiness and the awareness of unhappiness is too strong
the path of least resistance is to release the attachement to happiness
if happiness is not the goal, where you are can not be wrong because you compare the
now not to happiness

you cannot be where you are not if you dont want to go somehwere else

you cannot unwant something/happiness
but you can change your focus in a way that makes the now not unwanted

the best way to to let go of the destination of happiness is to fall in love with
what is, the NOW

The only reason that any Being suffers
is because they are currently believing a thought
that contradicts what-Is.
like the should thoughts

thinking you should be happy if you are not, makes you resist the now and
so you become even more unhappy

stress is caused by resisting what is

Embrace the idea that what happened
*should* have happened and was supposed to happen.
Embrace the idea that nothing can go wrong -
that everything that happens to us
is actually happening *for* us.

If you dont have full control of your Vibration - what nobody has - things
happen that cause us to feel negative emotions

But when we don't have complete control over our Vibrations,
and thus, our Point-of-Attraction, these things happen.
None of us maintains our Vibration at a level
where nothing ever happens to cause us
to feel negative emotion.

Embrace your focus to what is right now. with the intention of looking
for what is right about it
What is right about what is?

Focusing on the positive things within the unwanted things makes you feel emotioanlly
better and you change your vibration so that you can not match to the unwanted thing

Write in a positive aspects journal therefore
Look for proof that what is is right instead of wrong

Look for positives about being unhappy to release resistance to it
find approval for unhappiness.

Start to look at being unhappy as if something has gone right.
How is it 'right' for me to be unhappy?

Eg: Everybody in my in my situation would be unhappy
- Unhappiness causes you to know what you dont want and therefore what you do want
- it gives you clarity about your preferneces
- it leads you to self exploration and self discovery and introspection, self awareness
- it makes you connect to other people that are unhappy
- it is grounding and makes you see important things
- it forces you to move forward

Set a goal that is more attainable than happiness itself
something that is on the way to happiness
like three moments of contentment per day,
feeling of fullifllment one time each day

set little goals and climb up the ladder
the goal of happiness may overhwelm you and make you feel discouraged of it seems

Notice that happiness for you is a goal you never reach. The closer you want to get
to it the further it goes off into the distance

Realizing that you wont reach happiness helps you to stop chasing it in the future
and find a contentment with where you are

Enjoy the process of life instead of obsessiveley chasing the promise of future happiness

Focus the feeling of relief which is always attainable, in every emotional state.
Relief is caused by release

Feeling guilty Angry thoughts make you relief because they release the attachment to guilt
Vibrational increase makes you feel relief because you release a lower vibration

Chase relief instead of happiness.
You have only one option in all moments:
Better or worse?
Think, speak, act better or worse.
Choosing what feels makes you feel relief and go into the direction the universe wants you to
Choosing what feels worse feels like stress.

Have mercy and understanding with your thoughts, they dont want to hurt you
If you stop believing your thoughts they, if you stop validating them, they have no power
about how you feel.

nothing went wrong if you experience unwanted feelings.
they are necessary to know what is wanted.
Move in the direction of what is wanted and allow yoruself to choose to go int the
direction of what feels emotionally better

Striving for happiness makes you unhappy.
Understand that happiness that happiness is not something out there
which you attain,
Happiness is an ever-present essence
which must, instead, be Allowed ...

Thanks Teal

Author — Narasimha


WOW!  I know this is for short comments but Teal,  you wouldn't believe the understanding I just gained from writing my first post.  When my husband was dying,  a flock of robins came into our yard and stayed throughout the duration of his death process,  one robin sat on our window sill and never left his post.  I had never seen or heard of this before.  On my husbands final day here,  all the robins left and I knew that he had to go.  After he died,  not one bird came into our yard,  didn, t even fly over our yard.  This is why I needed them to come back.  I always wondered why this had happened with the birds.  It was the vibration.  WOW!

Author — Vivian La First


Thank you! I have been having such a hard time with my state of unhappiness...this makes sense and helps me get unstuck. Much love, & respect Teal. Love your book by the way!:)

Author — Mari Quiroz


Teal Scott is a tremendous blessing in my life. Thank you so much!♥

Author — LaNeika Gallon


My two fav quotes: Being unhappy causes me to know strongly what I don´t want, and thus, strongly what I do want. Being unhappy forces you to get unstuck in one way or another.

Author — Discoteque77